This is where first I write that the "you" I am writing about is not actually YOU who is reading this. And individually I am happy for the people I am going to refer to...however...as a group, well, I am really not that happy for YOU and you will see why. Read on.
Facebook. The bane of my existence. I try to stay away, but like a moth to a flame, I am addicted to the constant flow of generally unimportant information, links, photos from people that I may know from my neighborhood, or from 2nd grade, 30 moves ago. I like being a voyeur, I do. I am looking at YOUR photos, for sure, just keeping tabs on YOUR day-to-day life and generally being amused and entertained by what you post. And thank you. Please keep that up.
However....as a person who has battled her weight forever..F-O-R-E-V-E-R..and one who works out anywhere from 8-20 hours per week (yes, it is true, and not just "work out" by watching a sitcom while walking on the treadmill, but more likely running for two hours or cycling up a mountain all day) I am tired of hearing about people's miraculous weight loss. I also watch my intake, logging every morsel of food I consume, weighing my snacks, making sure to get a rainbow of fruits and veggies daily, eating organic, whole foods as much as possible...and yet...still my body wants to be right where it is. I have a solid frame and solid is where I am apparently meant to exist in this world. What makes me crazy is to see people who suddenly start an eating plan and drop from a size 14 to a size 2 in a matter of hours. "Finally I am in my grade school pants!". "Wow, I can finally shop at Gymboree for myself!" I am not upset that they are losing weight, that in itself is awesome. I am not upset that some people's bodies, once exposed to exercise and proper nutrition, respond by shrinking. I am upset that my own goddamn body refuses to budge. I can drop 20 pounds and my jeans go from snug to not-quite-as-snug. I can't recall the last time I had to throw out pants "because I was swimming in them". I am definitely smaller than I was a few years ago, I get that. But in the big picture, I weigh more than the average woman, and can also probably wrestle the average women and win many times over. But that is not my goal. I want to see myself in a photo and not go "geez, my muffin top is awful" or "crap, I have huge tits"....the stuff that is apparently here to stay...stuff I don't want. The comments from skinny or flat-chested friends "oh, I'll take your extra" is a nice offer, but until they have some sort of magical surgery to transfer breast tissue from one person to another with no recovery time for the price of a case of beer, it ain't gonna happen....I do appreciate knowing you are willing to help me out, though.
So YOU, YOU who has lost 50 pounds a month on the HCG protocol or Nutrisystem or even gone on Biggest Loser....yes, I am happy for you. But it's not fair, really, is it?
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